I had the most beautiful dream last night but it was cut so short because a car alarm went off right in the midst of it.
I dreamed that I saw a girl who was from Beverly Hills, Tennessee and she was so beautiful and delicate. She didn't have much growing up but she was just a pleasure to see. I didn't talk to her, I just knew her story somehow. I wish I could remember more about this but she was in line at a buffet and getting food and that is all I remember.
After that, I was in a large open universe. It wasn't a room it was all the world and I was knealing alone in this vast expanse. God was in front of me and I had the most extraordinary feeling of reverence, humility and love. Then, the car alarm went off and I woke up! Oh..I wanted to stay there so much.
It was a nice dream..after many tears, sometimes I have the most comforting dreams. This year is so difficult for me. I am not the person I used to be and I know that I will never be that person again. I grieve for myself, for my mistakes, for the pain I am causing everyone. I just live with sorrow. I don't mind it, it reminds me that I am very small and very fragile.
I am not going to say I am hopeful for the future because I know I will be stronger and I know that my future is bright. I know that I will live with this sorrow for the rest of my life. I want to believe there will be joy in there too but sometimes I can't see it, or feel it..I just feel numbness or sadness.
5 comments:
Thank you for sharing...we are always growing, always evolving and sometimes in the midst of our pain the answers come via our dreams..there is wonderful awareness here in this dream..and that's a GOOD thing, Debi :)
Thank you Debi!! :) I appreciate your comment!! :) :)
The wonderful thing about a buffet is that you can try things you have never eaten before or eat as much familiar comfort food as you like. It is all a matter of choice and preference.
I want to believe that Life is like that too. We can go to the buffet of experience as many times as we like and try new things or stick with what we know. Sometimes I am afraid to try new dishes but more times than not it turns out to be pretty rewarding.
On a spiritual level I’d say the Universe is like that too. Every experience is made in the kitchen of choice and God, Source, Creator, whatever is just waiting to see how you enjoyed the meal. You have as long as you like to try it all and you paid for it all when you came in the door.
Bon appétit!
Oh James! Thanks!! :) I love your insights...!! So glad to have you back, I missed you. I hope your vacation was SUPER!!! :)
Thanks, Bebbi! Vacation was great but it is good to be back.
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